As a woman who grew up in the 90s under the curated spell of Hollister, Abercrombie, and  Victoria's Secret, I have an almost hyper-awareness of my body through the lens of the male  gaze. I can recall several conversations with older men when I was a preteen, imploring that I not become “fat” like their wives. “Don’t become another useless woman who just shops with their husband’s money and takes care of the kids,” they’d say. Yes, seriously.

And of course, at 11 years old, I wanted to be impressive and liked. I didn’t get straight As for nothing, you know? So I took on this lifelong assignment to always be small and self-sufficient, to take what a man says to heart in order to “win” against the other women.  

I giggle as I reflect on and write this. Not because any of it is funny, but because. thankfully,  somewhere along the way, I realized the old saying is true: Girls rule, boys drool.

Read More